If there was a life I always wished for, it should be in other people’s shoes. I was tired of being a listening ear to people, while no one cares to listen to me or know how I’m faring.
I was enjoyed being everyone’s friend, and having people’s trust, but I grew to find out I was just a perfect listening ear with no one to hear what my mouth has to say.
I have lived almost all my life as a second place. I have an outspoken twin sister and my parent’s favorite as she relates to them more than I do. Not like I was given the chance anyway.
Many times, I was always there for her. On occasions that needed our presence she always talked me into styling her hair and dressing her up before I do mine. She always wants to be in the headlight.
I get tired from dressing her up, and will have no one to help me; I ended up not gracing the outings
I was always there to listen to her, and play the elder sister role, when she was even my elder.
Even most times, I needed her to listen to me; she always wanted to talk first.
She always had everything in her palms, friends, and all worth not, while I had none and the only time I was around for them is when they are depressed and just want to talk.
Well, I got used to it at some certain points in my life. I’m living with being that person who looks out for everybody, and will always be alone when I need somebody.
I understand your situation, I’m facing the same problem in my life. From childhood there was no one to listen to me, all my family uses to make fun of me reason being, I wasn’t enough to be mature like them. All my family members uses to acknowledge my sister, her behavior, her polite and calm nature.
I use to get jealous like what’s missing in me? I wanted to became intelligent like her and with time I lost my innocence. I became a bullied animal around the house, I started misbehaving with everyone and started fighting over with people near me.
I started domination with the people senior to me, sooner or later this inculcated in my day to day habits. As even in result today I’ve very limited friends or I can say face showoffs and no one in family members to ask.
I wish I could alter this in my life or find a way back to them.